There are people you are holding on to that are not meant to follow you into this phase of life. They were for a different season. It is time to transition. You can have gratitude for the time they were in your life. You can grieve that it is different now. You can release the guilt that they need to be forced in. Journal Prompts: It is definitely time to let go of... Perhaps it is time to let go of... If I let go, it would free me up to...

Healthy boundaries do not need to be sacrificed on the altar of community. If you have sacrificed too much, for too long, it's not community, it's a project. Projects can fill voids and give you a sense of meaning. No knocks for projects, and, genuine community is not perpetually lopsided. Side benefit, you'll tackle resentment when you identify and accept what you are a part of. Journal Prompts: My project is... My community is...

The pain from skipping paced trust-building is why many give up on community. If you leap from mailman conversation to sharing your deepest and darkest, without proper vetting, your emotional safety is left to chance. Stride by stride you can gather data about how a person can be trusted. - Journal Prompts: I pace… I have learned that my core is safe with… Perhaps I can share more with… Perhaps I need to share less with…

I geared up to put a winged, body-armor-like massage belt back into its original case. We gave it to my mother-in-law for Christmas, who then gave it back. I was surprised to find that I didn't struggle to put it back into its home. Most of my experiences returning something back into its original packaging involve squishing and violence. But this bag fit what it needed, no forcing. I immediately wanted to call the manufacturer and express my gratitude hoping that, someone, somewhere would let the design gods know that this is a necessary endeavor to repeat. Because forcing is frustrating and takes all your energy. Sustainable community is not forced. Journal Prompts: I force... ...does not feel right.

Healthy community necessitates healthy separateness. - Experiment with leaving behind the pressure facade of sameness. Wonder about tolerating perceived threats of differences. - Resist the impulse to meld into another. Find the ground under your two feet and connect at the hand. Journal Prompts: I have a difficult time tolerating differences like... If we are the same then...