Triangles A triangle happens when you involve a person outside of the original conflict, seeking an external alliance and attempting to maintain a sense of power. In family dynamics, triangulation can function as a way to relieve anxiety and avoid confrontation, ultimately helping the family maintain status quo. A Triangulation Example: Person A + Person B have a conflict. Person A feels anxious about the conflict and talks to Person C to help manage their anxious feelings and avoid working it out with Person B. Person C becomes a thermostat, enabling avoidance and relieving anxiety. Triangulation is understandable, but it ultimately undercuts what a family hopes for, connection and security. Journal Prompt: I triangulate when...

Ready When you are ready, put regret down. Peel it off. Kneel down and place it on the earth. Stand up. Take a moment to see it on the dirt in front of you. Decide to let it lie. Turn around. Walk away. Look back once more, walk further. Wave from a distance, keep walking. Journal Prompt: If I put regret down…

Setting boundaries with family is easier when you have a clear understanding of your values.

Your assumption cannot be that everyone is interested in change.

Expect that setting boundaries will include repeating yourself.

When you set boundaries with family, consider their capabilities.