Emotional Equality in Relationships, Part 1

Have women accidentally taught men they shouldn't take on emotional responsibility...

Painsgiving

Can we find gratitude through grief during the holidays.

Avoidance and Other Distractions

The act of avoidance is found in relationships. Avoidance shifts attention, keeps us outsourced, and removes us from seeing our own issues and doing our own work. Avoidance can be expressed in "if only" statements. If only _________ was fixed. If only they did ______________. If only they said _____________. If only they were__________. What … Continue reading Avoidance and Other Distractions →

Depressed because I’m Human not because I’m Mentally Ill

I'm aware of our culture's low tolerance for the uncomfortable. In my experience, there seems to be a fear that drives this low tolerance. The fear of limitations; that we can't fix everything, that it will remain messy, and resolution will not come. This fear seems to keep us in fixing mode and our tolerance low for … Continue reading Depressed because I’m Human not because I’m Mentally Ill →

Tribute

I shared the following for the funeral service for Donna. Thank you to all who attended and helped us celebrate her life... I am Brooke Bickert, daughter-in-law to Donna Bickert, a.k.a. Boosh. The first time I had a sit down conversation with Boosh, was when I was 17. Then, for only a short time she was Mrs. … Continue reading Tribute →

I Choose to Move On

The vicious cycle of "stuck" holds many hostage with bad memories, mistakes, and regrets. The burden of hurt and pain is genuine. I watch victims work hard to move on. But they struggle, they get trapped. Internal experiences keep them from letting go and moving on; yet I continue to see the desperation to move on and … Continue reading I Choose to Move On →

Hypervigilant Living: The Subtitle of Anxiety

Hypervigilance is a symptom of anxiety. Webster's defines hypervigilance as: Keenly watchful to detect danger. Wary. Ever awake and alert. Sleeplessly watchful. Hypervigilance is continually overdone awareness and it feeds anxiety. For the visual learner, imagine anxiety as a weed. Think of hypervigilance as the rain that cultivates the growth of a weed that eventually consumes your yard. If enough … Continue reading Hypervigilant Living: The Subtitle of Anxiety →

Maintenance

I took my daughter for an evening bike ride this week. For me, it's never just a bike ride. My mind can't help itself but drift to therapeutic analogies. As we took a ride, we quickly ran into a squeaky wheel situation. The single brake I had been relying on to not be squeaky, … Continue reading Maintenance →

Grieving

Grief can be loss, death, change, or disappointment. Each individuals' process is different yet the process remains the same. We lost our son 4 years ago to a horrific and rare bacterial infection. His name was Rory. Rory lived and breathed on this earth for a little over 3 hours, all of which he spent … Continue reading Grieving →

The Walls We Build Between Us, Part 1

There are many ways to get off track in a relationship. If we are honest, we can own our part in the failures we have experienced and mistakes we have made in relationships. The goal of this next series is to connect with common ways couples get off track. Today we will look at “Stonewalling.” … Continue reading The Walls We Build Between Us, Part 1 →